The Sage Five


I’m leaving this up for one more day as the challenge ends tomorrow.  This one was so much fun and I have really enjoyed reading the works of my fellow Queens!



Guten Morgan Xangaland!

Happy October!  Can you believe it’s here already? 

Well today is yet another Kween of Queens challenge… I must say that I really enjoyed participating in this one and I can’t wait to read everyone elses!  If you would like to do so please go HERE

I wrote this with the five younger siblings that Ryan and I have between us in mind.  So this is dedicated to Charly, Zach, Becky, Andy, and Josie.


The Sage Five

Please list 5 (five) bits of advice that you think a newlywed couple needs to know. many of us are married, or have been married for many years. Please impart the wisdom of your experiences to these young people! A simple list is sufficient. If you feel a need to go into detail, by all means do so! If you merely wish to list 5, that’s fine too!



“Mawwiage… Mawwiage is what bwings us togevah today… Mawwiage and twue wuv.” ~The Princess Bride~

When my husband and I were married over six years ago my father toasted us at our reception. What he said has stayed with me for all the years I’ve been married and I sincerely doubt it will fade away any time soon. His toast was simple and profound, words of wisdom that we strive to live by daily.

“May your life be filled with the three F’s. Faith, family, and fun. May your faith be as strong fifty years from now as it is today, may you always remember that you are a family and stick together, and may you never forget to laugh and have fun.”

When this challenge was put before me I had a rare moment of complete clarity. I knew exactly what I would write, what my advice would be to someone getting ready to take the plunge… It would be my father’s toast. The three F’s and two of my own.


“May your faith be as strong fifty years from now as it is today…”

There will be times when you are tempted. Tempted to give up, to quit, to lose hope. Don’t. God will never leave you or forsake you and He is always faithful. In some ways it was so much easier to trust Him before I was married before I was a grown up I guess you would say… Yet as an adult I have proof of His words, of His promises. Though there were times my faith wavered I kept it and in the end it did not fail me. Trust in your convictions. Remember that sometimes you have to look at raging storm clouds as ‘Just a bit of shade’ For the sun will always shine on in the end. Storm clouds can only hide the sun but the sun has the power to burn away those clouds. Remember that and never lose your faith.


“…May you always remember that you are family and stick together.”

When you marry you leave both of your families and you become a family of your own. Your immediate family ceases to be your mother, father, brothers, sisters and becomes simply your husband or your wife. Never forget that in all things that this new family comes first! You are to take care of each other no matter what. But if there is one thing I’ve learned in my short life it’s that family is everything, don’t forget where you came from in your haste to get where you’re going.


“…and may you never forget to laugh and have fun.”

In every marriage there will be hardships. You will find yourself struggling to survive the world and each other at one time or another and if you are me it will be lot’s of times! Don’t forget to hold on to the little things… treasure them close to your heart. The tickle wars, the gooshey eyes, the whispered endearments, the gestures that only the two of you get, the stupid faces, and bad jokes… Don’t let the hard times wipe those away. Always laugh, even when you don’t feel like it, always have fun, even if you can’t afford it! Marriage is two people carving out a place for each other in their hearts and a place in this world together. If you have no enjoyment in it then what is the point?

And for my two…


“Get back witch!  I’m not a witch I’m your wife!” ~The Princess Bride~

I don’t care what anyone told you, no matter how much in love you are there will come a time when the honeymoon is over! Suddenly the way he blows his nose will drive you nuts, the way he turns his pants inside out when he takes them off will incite you to violence, and the way he slaps your butt when your angry will ignite a white hot passion to murder him. It happens, sorry to dissolution you, but it does. Of course this has never happened to me so I don’t know what advice to give you. Okay, okay, I’ll give you this. Be friends. Never let that die. For this is the true heart of a marriage. Cherish it.


“I’m not saying I’d like to build a summer home here, but the trees are quite lovely.”  ~The Princess Bride~

My absolute favorite subject! Once again I hate to dissolution you but unless you have a drawer full of silver spoons to pawn off in the slim times, there will be times when McDonalds sounds like a fancy sit down dinner. I could not begin to guess why you will go through this I only know that you will. Life will inevitably throw you a curveball and you’ll find yourself at the shorter end of the stick once in a while. Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to love each other in spite of the money. Don’t let it come between you. Square up with each other back to back and give that checkbook what for! In the meantime while you battle with it to the death I have a few recipes that saw me through the lean times… Poor mans food.

Pinto Beans

4 cups pinto beans (2 pounds)

2 Tablespoons Salt

2 Tablespoons Sugar

Sort through the beans and soak overnight. (Do not under any circumstances skip this step. Sometimes there are tiny rocks in the beans and remember you are broke and can’t afford a trip to the dentist.) 7am next morning drain and rinse the beans until the water runs clear. Put back into pot and fill with water. Cook on high for 9 hours (5pm) 30 minutes before eating add sugar and salt and start your cornbread. (If you could afford it this paycheck)

Serve with cheese.

I usually made this on a Sunday and we ate it for three nights… then on Wednesday I made chili!

Chili from Pinto Beans

½ a pot of Pinto beans

1 Sautéed onion

1 pound ground beef

1 cup salsa

1 can undrained kidney beans

1 can drained black beans

1 packet chili seasoning

1 bell pepper

Sauté onions and bell pepper. Mix all ingredients in the crock pot, top off with water and cook for 4 hours on high or all day on low. Eat with remaining cornbread (You can splurge and make a new pan if you can afford it!)

*Tip* If you don’t already have a crock pot on your registry get one, and when someone like me who knows it’s value gives it to you, learn to use it! Though I’m no longer poor as a church mouse it’s one of my favorite cooking tools, you won’t regret having a good one.


In Conclussion

“I wonder if he’s using the same wind we are using?” ~The Princess Bride~

There you are, my five pieces of advice. I hope that they help you to laugh your way through the hard times if they bring you nothing else. And don’t let them scare you away… I do not regret a moment of the heartache, the broke times, the moments of panic… except maybe one thing… what the chili made from three day old beans did to my husband!


Song for the day?  Why ‘Storybook Story’ from The Princess Bride of course…  Somehow that movie has become the ‘Theme song’ for Ryan and my mawwiage!  LOL





33 thoughts on “The Sage Five

  1. Awesome post and I can relate to it. I agree the crockpot is great. I really like the friend,fun,and finance part. You really hit the nail on the head with this post and I hope any younger people just starting out read it and take the advice because it couldn’t have been said any better.

  2. Wonderful post.  Makes mine seem kinda plain now.  LOL.  Do you know how many pinto beans we ate when we were first married? and rice?  That was all we had at the time.  You are spot on with the finances and McD’s did look good to us on more than one occasion.  Now we are pretty good at money management and can actually hit Carl’s Jr.  LOL.  Have a great day

  3. what a great post.  i love the finances and friendships.  the way my husband slurps his cereal drives me to want to incite violnece sometimes.  haha!ryc:  thank you.  i truly cant recall the last time i have been on antibiotics.  i had no idea so my thanks to you!

  4. I always enjoy reading your posts. You did an exceptional job on this assignment. It is beautifully done, and I agree completely, although I have limited marriage experience (19 weeks) I do have many years of observing and listening to others. I love the way you incorporated the quotes from the Princess Bride. Really well done!
    Have a great week!

  5. MiLady,
    Such wonderful advice and insight!  Your father was a wise man who raised an equally wise daughter!  Sorry I didn’t get by earlier, but my laptop does not like your site. . .keeps shutting it down.  I am now on the desktop which is more into music than the laptop!~Kween

  6. Oh what a lovely and thoughtful’ post* such wise words..thank you for sharing yours* take good care there in beautiful Germany…enjoyed reading this very much…Lee* aka-priorites

  7. Great advice!  I left Faith out of mine, but should have included it.  God is what guides us through our happy and tough times.  Thanks for yet another great read.

  8. You are so creative!  I love the post and Princess Bride is one of my favorite movies.  My husband and I have been married for 21 years and still have trouble talking civily to each other about finances!  My parents got married in the 40’s right after WWII.  They were so poor and only had about $2.00 to spend on groceries a week.  They lived on fried mush for the first year!  Have a great day!

  9. Shoot, I forgot to say that for the frozen fruit I usually buy raspberries & strawberries! I eat them frozen with cool whip as a dessert mostly so I don’t really defrost them, LOL. raspberries are the best frozen in my opinion, and mixing it with cool whip gives you a “raspberries & cream” taste. 🙂 Same with peaches although sometimes the commissary has frozen peaches and sometimes they don’t…but they always have raspberries (in my experience). 🙂

  10. *Waving my hand over my heart*
    ABSOLUTELY the most romantic post I have read yet on marriage advice!  I loved this-and the fact that you used Princess Bride made this all the better.
    Man!  You make even the bad times of marriage sound ROMANTIC!

  11. I forgot…ryc:  Yes, I don’t get to share my testimony very often but rolled on the floor laughing at your comment about meeting my king while on the royal throne…
    I have always thought God has some sense of himor…

  12. Wow! Great advice, yummy recipes, and The Princess Bride quotes all in one! That is one of my most favorite movies… and my Ubby’s. I also have lean times recipes that I still use. I loved your post!How do you like Germany? We’ve been to Munich twice and once to Frankfort. LOVED Munich.

  13. That was so beautifully done! Amazing. Thank you for the happy tears this morning. this is also our theme song. Huby sings this song to me all the time. It brings tears to my eyes to hear it this morning and such warmth in my heart, no coffee could put there. Wonderfully done. thank you.

  14. MMM that fruit dip sounds really tasty!!!! I am so going to try that!!!!! 😀 I agree that I enjoy the AF style for the most part, but the last minute deployments or waiting for orders when you PCS could drive people craaazyyy! lol! But it’s always nice to know there are other military wives who can relate to you, that’s definitely a big plus!! 🙂 Oh, I have a strange question!! When you ordered your yarn from, did it all come in one box? I got SEVEN seperate e-mails confirming the shipment of my order and it looks like they shipped each color of yarn seperately!!! I’m like….ummm…am I going to get seven different boxes each carrying one skein of yarn?? LOL!!!! it’s going to be an embarassing day at the post office if that is so…. :)!!!!!

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