Hey Everyone


Tonight I am going to post a story called Military Spouses.  Forewarning…. It will make you cry…. even sob.  It was sent to me by Kritijo whose husband is about to return home after a very long tour in Iraq.  She is a rock and I am so happy for her.  So this is dedicated to her and all of you military wives out there who are dealing with a seperation, facing one, or have been through one.  Here’s to the toughest job in the military.  I just could not resist.  This an awesome explanation of how it feels and what it entails to be left behind as a military spouse.



By Paige Swiney

It was just another harried Wednesday afternoon trip to the commissary.  My husband was off teaching young men to fly.  My daughters were going about their daily activities knowing I would return to them at the appointed time, bearing, among other things, their favorite fruit snacks frozen pizza and all the little extras that never had to be written down on a grocery list.

My grocery list, by the way, was in my 16-month-old daughter’s mouth, and I  was lamenting the fact that the next four aisles of needed items would pass by while extracting the last of my list from my daughters mouth, when I nearly ran over an old man.  This man clearly had no appreciation for the
fact that I had 45 minutes left to finish the grocery shopping, pick up my  4-year old from tumbling class and get to school, where my 12-year-old and her car pool mates would be waiting.

I knew men didn’t belong in a commissary, and this old guy was no exception.  He stood in front of the soap selection staring blankly, as if he’d never had to choose a bar of soap in his life.  I was ready to bark an order at him when l realized there was a tear on his face.  Instantly, this grocery isle roadblock transformed into a human…. “Can I help you find
something?”  I asked.

He hesitated, and then told me he was looking for soap.

“Any one in particular?”  I continued.

“Well, I’m trying to find my wife’s brand of soap.”

I started to loan him my cell phone to call her when he said, “She died a  year ago, and I just want to smell her again.”

Chills ran down my spine.  I don’t think the 22,000-pound Mother of all Bombs could have had the same impact.  As tears welled up in my eyes, my half-eaten grocery list didn’t seem so important.  Neither did fruit snacks or frozen pizza.  I spent the remainder of my time in the commissary that
day listening to a man tell the story of how Important his wife was to him — how she took care of their children while he served our country.  A  retired, decorated World War II pilot who flew over 50 missions to protect  Americans still needed the protection of a woman who served him at home.

My life was forever changed that day.  Every time my husband works too late or leaves before the crack of dawn, l try to remember the sense of importance I felt that day in the commissary.  Some times the monotony of  laundry, housecleaning, grocery shopping and taxi driving leaves military  wives feeling empty — the kind of emptiness that is rarely fulfilled when our husbands come home and don’t want to or can’t talk about work.  We need to be reminded, at times; of the important role we fill for our family and for our country.

Over the years, I’ve talked a lot about military spouses..how special they  are and the price they pay for freedom too.  The funny thing is; most  military spouses don’t consider themselves different from other spouses.  They do what they have to do, bound together not by blood or merely friendship, but with a shared spirit whose origin is in the very essence of what love truly is.

Is there truly a difference?  I think there is.  You have to decide for yourself.  Other spouses get married and look forward to building equity in a home and putting down family roots.  Military spouses get married and know they’ll live in base housing or rent, and their roots must be short so they can be transplanted frequently.  Other spouses decorate a home with
flair and personality that will last a lifetime.  Military spouses decorate a home with flare tempered with the knowledge that no two base houses have the same size windows or same size rooms.  Curtains have to be flexible and  multiple sets are a plus.  Furniture must fit like puzzle pieces.

Other spouses have living rooms that are immaculate and seldom used.  Military spouses have immaculate living room/dining room combos.  The coffee table got a scratch or two moving from Germany, but it  still looks pretty good.  Other spouses say good-bye to their spouse for a business trip and know they won’t see them for a week.  They are lonely, but can survive.  Military spouses say good-bye to their deploying spouse  and know they won’t see them for months, or for a remote, a year.  They are  lonely, but will survive.

Other spouses, when a washer hose blows off, call Maytag and then write a check out for having the hose reconnected.  Military spouses will cut the water off and fix it themselves.  Other spouses get used to saying “hello”  to friends they see all the time.  Military spouses get used to saying  “good-bye” to friends made the last two years.  Other spouses worry about
whether their child will be class president next year.  Military spouses worry about whether their child will be accepted in yet another school next year and whether that school will be the worst in the city…again.

Other spouses can count on spouse participation in special
events…birthdays, anniversaries, concerts, football games, graduation, and even the birth of a child.  Military spouses only count on each other;  because they realize that the flag has to come first if freedom is to  survive.  It has to be that way.  Other spouses put up yellow ribbons when the troops are imperiled across the globe and take them down when the
troops come home.  Military spouses wear yellow ribbons around their hearts and they never go away.  Other spouses worry about being late for mom’s Thanksgiving dinner.  Military spouses worry about getting back from Japan
in time for dad’s funeral.

The television program showing an elderly lady putting a card down in front  of a long, black wall that has names on it touches other spouses.  The card  simply says, “Happy Birthday, Sweetheart.  You would have been sixty today.”  A military spouse is the lady with the card, and the wall is the
Vietnam Memorial.  I would never say military spouses are better than other spouses are.  But I will say there is a difference.  I will say, without hesitation, that military spouses pay just as high a price for freedom as do their duty husbands and wives.  Perhaps the price they pay is even  higher.  Dying in service to our country isn’t near as hard as loving someone who has died in service to our country, and having to live without  them.

God bless our military spouses for all they freely give.

God bless America


Hope you all have a wonderful night/day.  Thank you all for your wonderful support through everything that has gone on in my life.  You are wonderful people whom I am most fortunate to have in my life.




9 thoughts on “

  1. Aww he was crying because he couldnt remember what soap brand his wife used to buy, he just wanted to smell that smell again.  That is sooo sweet. 

  2. That’s a great story that I’ve come across a few times, and it never ceases to be heart wrenching. 
    Sorry I haven’t been around much.  I really appreciate the movie reviews; maybe next time I’ll try to doe-eye Jason into renting 13 going on 30, as it would be all new to me, since I’ve never seen the Tom Hanks version.
    Those prior pictures of your yard also make me really appreciate the talent your efforts and mind have with making nature even more beautiful.  Great looking yard!

  3. I cant imagine what its like to be a military wife.  I think about our crazy life and how much my husband works.  Its nothing in comparrison what you all deal with.Have a beautiful day.Kelly

  4. *wipes tears*That was so beautiful.If you don’t mind, can I send thos story to my sister(in-law)? My brother in law is leaving for Iraq in November.I was a military spouse once, and I thank god for this expirience, because it has made me stronger, it has made me realise the importance in life.God bless you and all the other Military spouses out there.And god bless your husband for putting his life at risk for our freedom.Give him big hugs from me will ya? And many for yourself.It takes a strong person to stand beside her man. Love, Ann

  5. Oh, I’d read that before, and everytime I do, it makes me cry so HARD.  Thanks for sharing that…love you lady!

  6. that was beautiful…made me cry and sad and happy to know that I am officially considered in the group of such strong, patient, and amazing group of women…amazing story!! Thank you for sharing it and CONGRATS to your husband on the bike…mine would be jealous! Hes wanted one for so long and the goal is to get one when we finally get stationed together!!!

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