*EDIT AT THE BOTTOM*


Good morning Xangaland,


I am sitting here waiting for the crew to show up to finish off my door today.  Well mostly finish it off anyway.  They got the framing up yesterday and the block.  Today they are going to finish installing the door and window and put of the drywall and mud.  Then this evening they will come back to finish floating the drywall and then Friday morning to blow the texture….. so far so good. 


This is a picture of before they started adding anything.  I though I had pictures of the sliding glass door from before but it turns out if I did they got erased so this will have to do…..  Sorry that it is so dark but it is after all just a gaping hole in my house!



This is a picture this morning.  This is basically how it will look except of course for the fact that there will be dry wall and paint!



It already makes the room look so much bigger than it did before.  We are going to move the whole room around after this is done and it is going to open up everything so much.  I can’t wait for this to be done.  We have been planning for this for over a year now! 


I only have two more days with Ryan….  I am going to miss him so much!  If you still haven’t read why he is leaving there is an explanation post below this one.  Hope all of you have a good day.



Song of the day? Build Me Up Buttercup by the Foundations.  Why?  This one is a little random.  Ryan just started belting this song out last night while dancing around the room in his underwear so needless to say it is stuck in my head.  Not to mention I really like this song and it mentions building so there you go….. lol


*EDIT*


They are here and working.  Cross your fingers…. hopefully everything goes as planned and their part will be done tomorrow so I can paint and move the room around.  If it is all done my mom and dad have offered to come over on Saturday after I drop Ryan off at the base at 6AM and help me get it all done.  I hope this gets done so we can do it.  That would defiantly keep me occupied the day he leaves! 


*2nd EDIT*


They just left.  They are almost completely finished!  All that is left is to come sand and texture tomorrow and then my mom dad and I will paint and trim on Saturday!  Then they will be installing my gate on Monday.  Whooo!  Here is a pic for you…..



Courtney

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Okay so I didn’t get back yesterday….. life in all it’s grandeur has a way of getting in the way…. 


Most of you know we are having construction done on our house.   Well it has just kept getting put off over and over again.  Every day there is a new excuse….  So today is the absolutely we are coming you are confirmed for between 8 and 10 am today, we’ll be there.  Yeah when I see it.  You know?  I have to say I really hope they start today.  I can’t wait for my house to be put back together. 


My life has been so topsy turvy lately, but that’s a good thing.  Because like I always say ‘Life is in the journey not the destination.’  And like my husband has been saying the last few days.  ‘Sometimes our life resembles less of a freeway and more of a two lane country road during construction.’ 


So song of the day?  Dream on by Aerosmith…. I’m sure you can guess why….


So I am waiting……  I’ll let you know what happens……..


*EDIT*


About three minutes after I submitted this they came…  and they are working.  My contractor says that it shouldn’t take more than a day or two more than today.  I will post pictures after they leave today.  Hope all of you are having a great day….


Courtney

Good morning Xangaland,


I have had a very busy week so far. There are lots of things to write about but I don’t have the time at the moment.  I will try to come back a little later but I have to go get ready for my day and start working around here.  Why you might ask? Because of this…..


<A href="http://premium.xanga.com/Private/xtools/


(In case you can’t read this as Tickercentral is being a pain today it says that Ryan is leaving for Tyndal AFB in 4 days.)


I can’t believe it is almost time for him to leave…. again….  (sigh)  Oh well such is life.  I will be back later. 


Song for the day? Or maybe just this post depending on when I get back?  I want to Break Free by Queen Why? Cause some days I just do… I want to not have so much weighing down on my shoulders.   I want to not have so much to do in the four days I have left with my husband.  Oh well soon everything will be back to a semi normal state and this summer there will be too much inactivity due to the outrageous temperatures.   So I will enjoy this spring that has allowed me to get so much done. 


Courtney


*EDIT*


I don’t usually do these things but this was fun….


1. YOUR PORN STAR NAME: (Name of first pet / Street you live on):
Turkey Tierra Buena

2. YOUR MOVIE STAR NAME: (Name of your favorite snack food / Grandfather’s first name):
Beef Jerky Don

3. YOUR FASHION DESIGNER NAME: (First word you see on your left / Favorite restaurant):
Capital Mimi’s

4. EXOTIC FOREIGNER ALIAS: (Favorite Spice / Last Foreign Vacation Spot):
Cayene
Mexico


5. SOCIALITE ALIAS: (Silliest Childhood Nickname / Town Where You First Partied):
Corky
Phoenix


6. “FLY GIRL/BOY” ALIAS (a la J. Lo): (First Initial / First Two or Three Letters of your Last Name):
C Lau

7. ICON ALIAS: (Something Cool Within Sight / Any Liquid in Your Kitchen):
Calendar Koolaid

8. DETECTIVE ALIAS: (Favorite Baby Animal / Where You Went to High School):
Puppy Barry Goldwater

9. BARFLY ALIAS: (Last Snack Food You Ate / Your Favorite Alcoholic Drink):
Easy Cheese Mudslide

10. SOAP OPERA ALIAS: (Middle Name / Street Where You First Lived):
Marissa Morrow

11. ROCK STAR ALIAS: (Favorite Candy / Last Name Of Favorite Musician):
Reeses Pieces Armstrong


12. YOUR STAR WARS NAME: ( First 2 letters of your first name and the first 3 Letters from your last name makes your first name. Take the first 2 letters of your mother’s maiden name and the first 3 letters of the city you were born in for your last name):
Colau Hipho

*EDIT*


I just bought size 16 jeans!!  I have been in 22’s for three years… Yipee!!!!!


 


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Hey everyone,


Hope your having a wonderful day today with your families.  We are only a few short hours away from heading over to my in-laws to have dinner.  Should be fun.


Just wanted to give you a quick little advertisement for some of the things on my site.  I don’t know if any of you know but I write movie reviews through xanga.  I will soon be branching out to do books and music as well.  You can too!  At the top of the page under the banner are four links: site name, reviews, events, and subscribe.  All you do is click the reviews and your there.  When you read mine you can choose to comment or if you want to have a review of that movie on your site just hit review and it will automatically send what you write to your site!  I have another way to get there in my story module off to the left as well.  It is called Did you know I write reviews?  I think this is a fun tool and helpful.  It lets me catalog the movies I have seen and gives you the option to see the opinion of someone esle besides the critics.  Seems everything they don’t like I do so I started to write my own.  Sulimb also has begun to write reviews for those of you who read her as well.


The second thing is that I get a lot of questions about my gastric bypass surgery.  Instead of reposting an explanation post every few months I have put up a section in my story module dedicated to it.  It is under the heading My Life Before and After Gastric Bypass Surgery.  The top link is the The Reason which explains my need for the surgery and the second is the Latest Update post. 


Okay advertisement is over.


Song of the day?  Indescribable by Chris Tomlin  This song for me is an awesome description of the God of my heart.  It makes me feel so completely sure of who I am and what I am when I know beyond a shadow of a doubt the God that is behind me and in me at every turn of the road in this life.  What an incredible praise……… And yet to all of this he gave his Son to die for me.  There is no greater love than that, none other.


From the highest of heights to the depths of the sea
Creation’s revealing Your majesty
From the colors of fall to the fragrance of spring
Every creature unique in the song that it sings
All exclaiming

Indescribable, uncontainable,
You placed the stars in the sky and You know them by name.
You are amazing God
All powerful, untameable,
Awestruck we fall to our knees as we humbly proclaim
You are amazing God

Who has told every lightning bolt where it should go
Or seen heavenly storehouses laden with snow
Who imagined the sun and gives source to its light
Yet conceals it to bring us the coolness of night
None can fathom


Once again I hope all of you have a beautiful day today.  May God Bless you and keep you and make his face to smile down upon you.  Happy Easter.


Courtney


One little girl and one little boy holding hands on the playground of a small church spinning and laughing. Suddenly the little boy let go and the little girl goes tumbling to the ground.


” Ow Timmy, what was that for?”


” Who is that?”


And there she was. A cute little girl a year older than me with big green eyes, mousy brown hair, and a crooked smile. She was quiet and shy. She had hair almost as long as mine (which was quite a big deal for me at that age) and she had stolen my cousin Timmy’s heart. She is almost my first memory, she has always been there. She is Emily, my best friend.


Shortly after she came to the church I was moved from the nursery to the older class. This was due to the fact that I bit the other babies. And in the older class she was my friend.


That little boy Timmy? He was my cousin and his best friend was a little boy named Ryan. The four of us did everything together. And of course you guessed it the little boy Ryan, is none other than the man I call my husband. Timmy was my husband’s best man and Emily was my maid of honor at our wedding.


 


When we were old enough we started spending weekends at each other’s houses. We practically grew up together and in the forming of our friendship we adopted each other’s families. I grew up with two mothers, two homes, and a lot of siblings, as Emily has six and I have two! We have been there through every good time and every bad, through thick and through thin, whether joy or heartache. We have seen each other’s strengths and weaknesses and we have remained friends through all of it.



When I was 12 my family left the church I had grown up in. I was separated from all of the people I had grown up with, from my cousins, my aunts and uncles, the little boy I loved, but never from Emily. There is a lot to the story of why my family left, maybe someday, but let it be enough for me to say that our parents did not let the politics of what had happened keep Emily and I a part. Even though I went through a time when I felt so isolated from everybody I loved Emily was always by my side.



When I was 13 I hit a bit of a bad spot in my life. I am told it is called puberty! Somehow that word does not seem to embody the person I became. I hated everything and everyone, I was the poster child for anger for quite awhile. Looking back I’m not sure how Emily could stand me but she was the only one who could make me smile or laugh for it seems years. She would come over and we would talk or sometimes just read aloud to each other. Some days if things were really bad I would be too angry to speak to anyone and that included her. So she would sit in my room patiently singing to herself Sunday school songs. There was one that sticks out in my mind above all others. The words went like this.


“This is my commandments that you love one another that your joy may be full.”


The song said that line over and over and over again and Emily would sing it over and over and over again until I blew up and talked to her or I laughed. One way or another Emily always won. As meek as she can be She is one stubborn human being.



The years went by and things change as things always do and yet we remained friends throughout everything. I don’t think anyone expected our friendship to last as long as it has. As I have said she was very shy and quiet to I was not, I’m still not. I was strong and unafraid She was the opposite. People have always thought that I bossed her around that I take advantage of her but that is surprisingly not the truth. She lets me decide what we’re going to do or where we’re going to eat because she doesn’t like to decide and she doesn’t really care. But if the decision is important or she just doesn’t want to do something I would have a better chance of strong arming a mule. if something is important Emily won’t budge.



For many years now people have referred to Emily and I as a lamb and a lion. She is a lamb, gentle, quiet, unimposing. I am a lion, tough, strong, bold, sometimes too much so. She has always said that if it wasn’t for me she would have been a wallflower all her life. She would have faded into the background long ago. If it wasn’t for her I don’t even like to think what kind of a person I would have been. She says the lamb has made the Lion gentle and the lion has made the lamb brave.



God put us together for so many reasons I’m sure, but if no other reason is ever revealed to me this would be enough, that Emily in all her softness has been a pillar of strength to me throughout my life.


It’s funny how reading back over this there is an impression that Emily was like an older sister to me and that has never been the case. Somehow I have always been like a mama bear over Emily. Nobody messes with her, nobody. She is special. She is unique. She has an imagination that could go for miles, she is a writer. She lives in daydreams half of the time and the rest of the time she insists on never believing anything bad about anybody. She is always happy she is always joyful, no matter how much life gets her down she insists on seeing that silver lining. And so my goal in life has been to let one person hold on to those things past childhood.



Everybody should have just one Emily in their lives. So that when it storms you will have that one person that screams over the thunder hey isn’t this fun don’t you love storms. So that when your life a sunny you have someone to rejoice with you, and when it is cloudy you have someone to remind you that the sun is still behind that cloud and will show its face again.


This is my favorite picture of her.  It was taken in our meadow in the White Mountains.  It is her personality in a picture….



” Lions are always brave, lambs are always gentle, but if the two lay together, it is because the lamb has learned to be brave and the lion to be gentle.” Emily


One little girl and one little boy holding hands, spinning and laughing in a church yard…. Then they grew up and life goes on…  But some things last forever.


Courtney


 


Song of the day? Strawberry Wine by Deanna Carter.  Not for the content but for the feeling of old memories, days long gone, but not forgotten………

Today was a sad day in my own little world. 


Many of you have made comments about my hair when you have seen it in past pictures.  I have had long hair my whole life and I love it.  But a handful of times I have just had enough and chopped it off.  It grows really fast so this has never been a big deal… but today it is.   Because you see I am not tired of long hair, I did not cut it out of necessity or frustration, I cut it out of need.  I have hit the stage in my after surgery life when my body panics and thinks it isn’t getting enough.  Everyone goes through it and it is short lived but unavoidable and so for the last few weeks my hair has been falling out.  I have very thick curly hair so I can lose a lot without it being too noticeable but that doesn’t mean I like it.  It was so long it was catching on things and winding around things and I was not only losing it I was pulling it out…  Today I had my mom cut it all off. 



Here is a picture from only a few weeks ago before I started losing it…  long and even though I brushed it out still a bit curly.



So goodbye my hair. 


 


Update Post


I haven’t done an update for a while and since I have already talked a little about what is going on I probably should.  I am doing really well.  As I said above I am in a stage where my body thinks I am not getting enough even though I am.  The body then begins to shut down non essential functions to conserve energy.  It is only supposed to last about six weeks and it has already been three so I’m halfway through.  The result has been hair loss, lack of elasticity in my skin, brittle nails, and I’m tired a lot.  No worries I’m getting all my nutrients and my vitamins.  It will be over soon.  I have now lost 68 pounds and I feel wonderful.  I have more energy now then I have had in our entire marriage. 


Here are some update pictures for you. Close ups before and after.  Told you my nose was bigger and longer than it looked.  No one believed me.


 


And full length before and after. Sorry I had to stand like that.  I wanted to show how much I have actually lost and all my clothes are too big now and I’m too cheap to go buy in between clothes so I’m just pushing in the shirt so you can see. 


 


So there you go.  I am still exercising, and playing racquetball with Ryan, I’m not getting any better though… Oh well all in time.  I will beat him one of these days.   I have been so busy this last few weeks and there have been so many things going on.  I promise I will catch up as soon as I have a little more time. 


The time is coming quickly for Ryan to leave.  He is leaving on the 2nd of April which sounds far away until I tell you it is in 9 days if you count the day he leaves!  I’m going to miss him so much.  I have decided to use this next month to get the thousand things done that go undone for so long when there are a thousand more to do…..  Hopefully by the time he comes back I will be caught up with a lot. 


Song of the day? I need you by Jars of Clay Why?  Because I do.


Strangely out of place
There’s a light filling this room
Where none would follow before
I can’t deny it burns me up inside
I fan the flames to melt
Away my pride
Do I want shelter from the rain
Or the rain to wash me way?

[chorus]
I need you, I need you, I need you
I need you, I need you, I need you
You’re all I’m living for

[verse]
I might sound like a fool
But I think I felt you moving
Closer to me
Face to the ground
To hide the fatal cut
I fight the weight
I feel you lift me up
You are the shelter from the rain
And the rain to wash me away


I think this is a beautiful song.  Such a captured moment of faith.  What it is to be broken and to be made whole.  Make of it what you will. 


Courtney

Good morning everyone,


Song for the day?  Praise chorus by Jimmy Eat World.  Just seems to give me motivation today to get done all I need to. 


Are you gonna live your life wonderin’ standing in the back lookin’ around?
Are you gonna waste your time thinkin’ how you’ve grown up or how you missed out?
Things are never gonna be the way you want.
Where’s it gonna get you acting serious?
Things are never gonna be quite what you want.
Or even at 25, you gotta start sometime.
I’m on my feet, I’m on the floor, I’m good to go.
Now all I need is just to hear a song I know.
I wanna always feel like part of this was mine.


Yep that’s how I feel today.  So I’m gonna go out and take hold. 


Another crazy day in store so I don’t have time to write.  But boy do I have some things to talk about.  I will try to come back later.  Hope you all are having a great day.  Take care.  Thank you for all your wonderful commments. 


Courtney